To all the men I’ve slept with, loved, and lost,

I grew up thinking I could never be with you.

I grew up thinking wanting you was wrong.

All I ever wanted was to feel your skin against mine.

All I ever wanted was to kiss you openly and in public.

In my mind, we were more than just friends.

In my mind, we were in love.

I remember thinking that I was never going to feel wanted by someone.

Until I met you I didn’t know what love was.

Until I met you I didn’t know what it was like sleeping next to someone I cared so deeply about.

Until I met you I didn’t know what heartbreak was.

Although we didn’t last, you still mean the world to me.

Although we didn’t last, I’m happy you were in my life when you were.

Thank you for making me feel wanted for the first time.

***

Would You Lie With Me (2022) is a semi-autobiographical exploration of relationships; a love letter to all the men that have come in and out of my life whether they have been romantic, platonic, or physical. This exhibition is a result of a year-long journey of self-discovery and embracing my identity as a gay man. Growing up in a Latin American Catholic household, I was surrounded by homophobic thinking from family members and peers which resulted in me feeling like I could not live my life authentically. Prior to coming out at 23, I never had any form of romantic or physical intimacy with anyone, although it was something I longed for. The photographs on display feature a mix of still lives, self-portraiture, and portraits of different men with whom I have developed connections of varying degrees. The imagery depicted plays with truth and fiction. With staged photographs serving as a false memory of my fantasies that I have carried from a young age while others may depict an act of genuine romantic intimacy between myself and a former partner. Together the photographs create a visual diary of my queer history, a diary that I allow to be viewed and read for those who choose to see.